It amazes me that love can turn to hate in a matter of seconds. I must admit that I am guilty of this. But what causes this? I am doing some reading to try and better myself, but it seems like no matter how much progress I make, just one incident can totally wipe out all the progress that I have made. And when a couple just gets done making love, and sharing their love for one another, telling each other that they are the best, and I have never been with anybody like you, just a small argument can trigger so much hate that they say I hate you when just a few hours ago you were the best thing in the world to them. Human behavior is a mystery that I have not been able to figure out for many years. As we all know it is so complex.
After the hate is all said and done, and the person has had time to think about what they said, then a strong level of remorse comes over them. Then the couple makes up, they profess their love for one another, they make love to show how much they love one another until the next time there is a disagreement ,and the words I HATE YOU are tossed around again. Then the cycle keeps repeating itself. This can put a great strain on a relationship and eventually they end up breaking up.
I am very fortunate that I can see my faults, and admit that I have a problem. This I believe is the first step to healing. Do not get me wrong, I am no professional, I am just sharing 24 years of experience. So what I say here is not set in stone.
It hurts that my wife and I have go through this battle. We just want to be happy together. That is why I am going to stop the vicious cycle, and do everything in my power to become a better husband. I WANT TO BE A BETTER HUSBAND!!! I suppose something like this just does not happen overnight, there will be relapses, but as long as I learn, and I am committed to changing, eventually I WILL HEAL AND BE HEALTHY.
I am also very fortunate to have a loving and caring wife. A wife that is willing to work on issues and have an open mind to change. We do not blame one another, because we know that we are both responsible for when we get into disagreements.
If your spouse and you are having the same issues, I encourage the both of you to make a commitment to put aside your differences, and admit that the two of you have to change and make some compromises. This is not worth divorcing. And when you do set aside your differences, make it a point to do something nice for one another, to celebrate a new beginning. This will go a long way into the healing process.
My hope for you is that you read something here that may help you in your journey. Thanks for reading and stay strong!!